Sometimes, the Lord allows me to catch glimpses of a future event by putting me in a situation where I can experience to a lesser degree what it will be like at some point later in my timeline. Today was such a day.
This week, I am “babysitting” two teenagers while their parents are out of town. Not bad, but part of the responsibilities I undertook when accepting the job was to drop off and pick them up from various extracurricular activities and classes. It’s not a bad life if you view it in the proper manner; there is no room to be self-centered if you are constantly catering to and arranging your schedule and plans to fit that of your charges.
This morning, I drove way out into the country to drop them off at a class. As I was driving there and back, my mind kept flitting to the awareness that one day, I could be doing this for my own children… and it filled me with happiness and joy. No, I don’t enjoy driving way out to the middle of nowhere, but I’m starting to realize all the lessons I’ve learned recently (especially those having to do with simultaneous joy and contentment) are preparing me to be a wife and mother.
The road curved and dipped as my mind continued to think about how blessed I was in so many things. A smile curved across my face as I felt the reality and security just knowing I have been blessed with a man who loves me and would do anything to provide, protect, and cherish me without hesitation. I thought about how his vision has expanded and how fierce his desire is to provide big things and a secure life for me and our children.
I felt so happy and secure. It’s true I miss him terribly while waiting, but the knowledge of his unwavering commitment and dedication wrapped around me like warm, strong arms and comforted softly.
As small houses flashed by, I realized that no longer did I have to think about and expect the miniscule, no longer did I have to think small, no longer did I have to patiently resign myself to the idea that big or good things must wait… God was changing many things, including my perspective. I felt provided for, cared for, and cherished.
With the residue of memories from the person I used to be a couple years ago, I began reading my Bible, only to come across a promise/reminder from God: “For the land, whither thou goest in to possess it, it is not as the land of Egypt, from whence ye came out, where thou sowedst thy seed, and wateredst it with thy foot, as a garden of herbs. But the land, whither ye go to possess it, is…” and the descriptions followed. A plentiful, overflowing, big, rich, prosperous land blessed by the Lord; a Promised Land.
And new joy and happiness flooded me as this reconfirmation lodged within me; the way has been rocky and hard, full of tears and aches. God is but preparing and leading me there in fulfillment of His promises.
The crowning touch came when I read from Proverbs that “a virtuous woman is a crown to her husband.” Not only was God working in the life of my soulmate (and indirectly me) and blessing me through it, but He was also working in my life and blessing my future husband through me as attitudes and viewpoints changed for the better.
A glimpse of things to come bolstered by divine encouragement and confirmation… J
